church, failed attempts at family pictures, and a tirade.

this was indeed as good as it got.  church fared much better.

today the pastor did a sermon on 1 corinthians 11.  the joys of expository preaching, you take what you get and you don’t throw a fit!  so head coverings?  for reals.  awesomeness.  it turned into a great sermon on the glory of submission.  the passage is controversial because we don’t have anything definitive to go by as to what a head covering was.  …who was wearing them when, what they looked like, and more importantly, where we can get one.  but if you skip over that you still get the impression that women in the church were attempting to blur the lines between masculine and feminine.  both women and men were granted prayers and prophesying, but the men had leadership.  so perhaps the dames were thinking if they ditched the ponchos they would be more “equal.”

every man who prays or prophesies with his head covered dishonors his head.  but every woman who prays or prophesies with her head uncovered dishonors her head—it is the same as having her head shaved.

paul wrote them a letter and essentially said, don’t be idiots.  not only are you dishonoring your “heads,” those in authority over you, but you’re also dishonoring yourself.  why?  because our glory is in our submission.  joel compared this passage with the disciples asking jesus to show them the father.  jesus was just a humble man, poor, lowly in birth, and face it, not much to look at.  they wanted to cut to the chase and get the man upstairs.  jesus answered them, “don’t you know?  if you have seen me, you have seen the father.”  if you’re looking for god, don’t look up.  the glory of god is his ability to humble himself, humility to the point of death.  that is what will amaze us through all eternity.  not his “bigness,” but his willingness to make himself small.  and as a church we should be striving to radiate this glory to the world, not to annihilate it.  our god is a god who raises the dead and gives grace to the humble.  and as women, we are in the front lines modeling this grace.

so pushing it a little further, god has placed all things under authority and honoring authority honors god.  and as women we are called to evidence this submission in the way we submit to our husbands.  whatever the head covering was to the corinthians, we can safely say it was two things; public and discriminatory between male and female.  roman garments were more on the “one size fits all” side of things, so it was the veil that set apart the female.  which makes me ask, what is peculiar to the woman today?  not much.  fortunately for the fashion industry, androgyny can sell sex just as well flattering femininity.  it just has to be tight enough.  the opposite team has known for quite some time that beautiful femininity is god honoring.  which is why fashion models looks like concentration camp victims who learned make-up artistry from their stint in the circus.  just google patrick mohr and tell me if you don’t think you’ve died and gone to hell.  as far as i can say, when you wear a dress, when you look like a woman, you’re delivering satan a solid kick in the junk.  i’m not saying you can’t wear jeans and look like a lady.  i’m sure you can.  but as far as i can tell, you’re still riding the fashion industry’s train to who knows where – just a few cars back.  i think, as christian women, it behooves us to ditch public transportation and get a luxury sedan.  i mean, buses have their own potties for heaven’s sake.  we can do better.

now, i don’t mean we ditch the train for the covered wagon.  i’m saying get a jaguar, so don’t cry about it. and this is the main reason i don’t like doily’s or bun jock straps.  (what do they call those anyways?)  submission is not a drudgery, it’s a glory.  and if push came to shove, i’d have to take paris hilton over ugly betty.  even though everywhere betty goes she at least convicts people of one thing, their lack of submission.  their rebellion.  we should do the same thing, but we should do it in such a way that not only convicts them, but makes them jealous.  we have the best thing.  i’m all for having cake and eating it too.  truth and beauty, it’s like pie and ice cream.

so how can i publicly show honor to my husband and drive the world crazy?  i think it’s the glory of the feminine.  true femininity is submissive and it is also beautiful.  as my father has always said, “there is nothing prettier than a girl in a dress.”  you can try and make your distressed denim say you’re a lady, but you’re just competing with the calvin klein billboards that say you’re a slut.  the consistent message of jeans is ease, availability, and androgyny.  now a vintage tea dress.  that’s another story.

it says, “where you all going lemmings?  cuz i ain’t.”  and that’s really all i suggest.  get off the bus with the mobile potty and make a stand.  throw a little meaning into your wardrobe other than, “oh look, this is sparkly!  i think i’ll buy it.”  i’ve been wearing dresses consistently ever since rahab was born.  for me, i can throw on a skirt in the morning, man the dishwasher, home-school, and disinfect – all while looking like a woman.  doing the same thing in pants i look like the maintenance man.  dress up the pants and you just look like beyonce.  i really fail to see the fascination.  some women would rather die than give up their jeans.  and yes, i’ll just come out of the closet now and say i’m a legalist.  only in the sense that i think everything you do should have a reason.  god has crafted the world in such a way that everything has meaning.  i can set my table to the glory of god just as well as you can sing “shine, jesus shine,” to hopefully the same effect.  god is a god of the little things.    god is a god of everything.  so which god is in your closet?

and i suppose i have to say, “wearing jeans is not a sin.”  *yawn*  but i’m not in the market for what is and isn’t a sin or what is or isn’t against the law.  i’m after glory.  i’m playing for keeps.  i’m not holding down the fort, i’m after yours.  “for the earth will be filled with the knowledge of the glory of the lord as the waters cover the sea.”  so what is the most effective for radiating the glory of submission in a world that is in rebellion against god and his distinctives?  perhaps it’s just a plain and simple dress.  “let not your adornment be merely external—braiding the hair, and wearing gold jewelry, or putting on dresses; but let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the imperishable quality of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is precious in the sight of god.”  we don’t have to knuckle down and choose between goods, we get them all.  next time you go to winco, go in a dress and a right spirit.  adorn yourself, honor your head.  speak softly to your children, have six of them following behind you with their hair combed, and watch the casualties fall.  it’s like waterloo.  i’m telling you, satan cries himself  to sleep on grocery day.  pony up.