kale cashew fettuccine

i’m afraid it’s not much to look at.  in fact, the camera couldn’t even find anything to focus on.  it opted for the carrots instead.

well too bad, looks aren’t everything.  this dish made my pete and repeat list *and* passed the husband test.  so here is the recipe if you want to try it:

4 c.  steamed kale, stems removed

14 oz.  fettuccine, cooked

6-8  garlic cloves, pressed

4 c.  plain water

1 1/2 c.  raw cashews

2 1/2 t.  salt

2 t.  onion powder

2 t.  basil

1/2 c.  fresh parsley

1.  after greens have cooked add them to a large pot with garlic

2.  blend water, cashews, salt, and onion powder in blender until smooth.

3.  pour into greens mixture.  add basil and thicken over medium high heat, stirring constantly.

4.  stir in parsley and cooked fettuccine.

where’s the cheese?

a while ago i invited a lady, who had authored a vegan cookbook, over to school me in all that was holy.  or mostly cheap.  and that is what healthy cooking is, lest anyone has ever told you otherwise.  i’m kind of suspiciously eyeing the day when i can’t spend $150 on groceries a week and i have to keep my bulk millet in a bucket.  although this week, i was only thinking i wanted to have some money leftover for copyright infringement and wall art.  (fyi, staples told me no.)  suffice to say, we will be eating things that are good for us with nothing cool to show for it.

p.s.  i already have the blood pressure of a corpse and my husband looks like he was recently released from an internment facility.  someone buy me a deep fryer for christmas.

dinner:

m.  tomato/almond butter macaroni casserole + kale chips + rhubarb pie

t.  fettuccini made with kale and cashews + homemade bread + salad

w.  millet stuffing + cottage cheese + salad + homemade nutty tomato dressing +  ”cartwheels” (jael’s bake day)

thrs.   oatmeal loaf + kale slaw

fri.  w.w. pasta with cashew cheese + kale chips + peach raspberry crisp sweetened with white grape juice concentrate

sat.  bountiful basket, $16

sun.  thai curry

lunch:

m.  a slew of bean and cheese burritos at taco bell, $13.00

t.  homemade pretzels with cheese sauce + olives and cherry tomatoes

w.  peanut butter and jelly sandwiches on homemade bread + grapes

thrs.  tacos!

fri.  zucchini casserole + bread

sat.  daddy boy cooks indian

sun.  bountiful basket

breakfast:

m.  cereal

t.  blueberry parfaits with greek yogurt + egg cups

w.  10 grain cereal + melon

thrs.  eggs on toast + tea

fri.  blueberry/oatmeal muffins + egg cups + yogurt

sat.  waffles + peaches

sun.  baked oatmeal + blackberries

total = $118

stupid copyright laws.

i have made a pie

actually, i made two.  because that was the right thing to do.

one rhubarb and one illegitimately pilfered blackberry.  pick your poison.

but really i need to lay off.  pie making needs to get more militant around here and a little less grandois.  au revoir all butter crust.  mommy’s switching to oil.  *gasp*  sorry, but i ain’t gratin’, freezin’, chillin’ butter, and everything that touches it – like i have all the time in the world.  because i don’t.  i need to be able to mix it in one step, throw it in the pan, and into the oven.  that’s the next military objective.  it was nice knowing you, but that is why we have grandmas with a stockpile of vodka in their refrigerator and a tendency toward sunday dinner martyrdom.  see you in 20 years.  although i might stop in and say hello come christmas.

jehu, what have you done with the baby?

is it just me, or does he look suspicious?

luckily, she was quite happy to lay concealed and suck her thumb.  thus, no one was sitting on her.  although, personally, i wouldn’t mind a little underground either.

only there’s no sharing around here.  some people have all the luck.

where’s the beef?

a while ago i had the bright idea to have girls over for bubble tea and some recipe swapping.  so this week i am cooking through my friend megan’s menu.  i asked for her 7 favorite meals, put together and ready to go.  and she did her homework.  if you could swing it, i definitely recommend this kind of party.  way to rope the taste-buds up and haul them around the block.  yee-haw.

dinner:

m.  homemade pizza and sauce + mushrooms, zucchini, and olives + root beer

t.  sunny sunflower seed burgers + moosewood tahini-lemon sauce + potato wedges + fresh strawberries

w.  tacos + moosewood’s zucchini and pepper filling + avocados + tahini-lemon sauce + raspberry tea

thrs.  minestrone soup + artisan bread + kale chips + apple-brown sugar coffee cake

fri.  moosewood’s spicy baked beans with molasses + cornbread + spinach pear salad

sat.  chinese-style stir fry vegetables with moosewood’s basic stir fry sauce + brown rice

sun.  something indian and desperate

lunch:

m.  taco time, 4 items for $5  menu

t.  noodles made with peas and cream cheese + v8 juice

w.  cheese + lettuce sammiches on homemade bread + cherry tomatoes + tofu chocolate pudding  ;)

thrs.  beans + rice + homemade salsa + nutritional yeast

fri.  flippin’ quesidillas with leftover veggies fried with oregano and garlic salt

sat.  picnic?

sun.  tamales + spicy black beans + kale (i have lots of it)

breakfast:

m.  10 grain cereal + egg cups

t.  yogurt parfaits + granola + fresh strawberries

w.  fried eggs + toast + tea + melon

thrs.  baked oatmeal with fruit and nuts + yogurt

fri.  cereal + egg cups

sat.  waffles + peaches (from our tree)

sun.  pancakes + eggs

total = $129

for the record:

i enjoyed the zucchini taco filling.  everyone else mourned the absence of beans.  it was practically a funeral party.  sheesh.  the tofu pudding was a big hit, on the other hand.  don’t know why it turned out so runny though.  maybe because i used the blender and not the food processor like it said?  we will try it again and see what happens.  the real revelation of the week however was coffee cake.  where have you been all my life?  i am on the bandwagon now, watch out.

own it

i love facebook and the assortment of debacles i get to be privy to.  this latest one was a little far-out though.  doug wilson had the nerve, i mean the absolute gall, to say that if men and women do not pursue godly forms of submission and authority in marriage, they will simply pervert them elsewhere.  (i.e.  50 shades of grey.)  and i absolutely adore how nothing riles the mediocre more than saying a man is a man and a woman is a woman.  i can understand wanting to fine tune the above statement or flesh it out a little more, but that wasn’t what was making the river.  it was the undercurrent.  the simple fact that he suggested men initiate and women respond.  now if that’s all it takes to bunch panties then there’s really only one thing for it.  and that’s a little pride.

the headship of a good man isn’t a prison, it’s a fortress.  from which i’m more than happy toss down a few little french taunts, “go and boil your bottoms, you sons of silly persons!”  i’m sure eventually they’ll get the point and stop trying to classify “submissive” women as objectified, abused doormats with dismal sex lives.  i’d say it’s kind of like nursing in public.  the more you own it, the better the masses will acclimate.  and i don’t care how many christians fall down holding their knees and crying in the process, don’t apologize to them.  give them a hand up for sure, just don’t lick their pacifier off and pass it back.  if anything embarrasses christianity, it’s no the people who are standing, it’s the people rolling in the gutter bawling their eyes out.  or even worse, the ones looking for any opportunity to get there.  christianity doesn’t need more word mincing accommodationists, or people with hurt feelings.  what it needs are some chicks who can throw down some serious roller derby and know how to suck it up when they take it in the shin.  be proud of your role, be proud of your man, and as far as i can tell, a little rink rash never hurt anybody.

did i mention my husband makes bread?

isn’t it pretty?

he does that bread in five deal.  he keeps a bucket of dough in the refrigerator and makes a loaf every other day or so for his lunches.  but personally, i’m not convinced.  unless you got one of these back at the ranch, it simply doesn’t count.

no knead.  pshaw.

“i got hurt feelings, i got hurt feelings….”

there are so many times when i want to sing people the chorus to this song.

go ahead and cry me a river.  i’ll lip sync back-up from behind.  ;)

***  a little background, this came to mind last night as i was reading through the comments in the wake of this “too jolly for most” blog post.  i have a theory on this kinda thing.  it’s called, “lighten up.”  if anything, a christian should be the kind of person who knows how to take a beating and knows how to give one; without anger, bitterness, smallness, meanness or any kind of hurt or whining.  when someone hits you upside the head, you come up spitting teeth, smiling, and ready to go again.  why?  because you’re a christian.  you’re bought and paid for, you’re not a kardashian, and frankly, they can’t hurt you.  you’re full.  and how can you tell if such is the case?  well the easiest is when someone smacks you.  try it, see what comes out.  here’s to hoping it’s at least funny.

the comment section was full of a lot of smacked christians.  and from the looks of it, half of them shouldn’t have been let off the bench.  they’re the ones i like to call christians of the “lamb and dolphin” variety.  but have you ever noticed how the moment lambs and dolphins are threatened, they turn into rudely awakened, still due to be hibernating, dour, grumbling mama bears (a.k.a. not dolphins)?  that’s because lambs and dolphins just don’t cut it, unless your life is, in fact, a motivational poster.  and you don’t find those people in the comment section of a blog to begin with.  when the dukes come out (as well they should), they’re either going come out with a shrill, plaintive whine, or a giggle.  and to me, that’s the only dipstick you’ve got.  and it’s the only credulity you have for your return blow.  why?  because it shows your heart.  if you’re heart is full, there will be a lightness about you.  particularly in the way you handle offense.  if it’s not, your crying about how “that wasn’t very poster-like” will turn out sounding rather small and bitter, more suited to signage at hot topic.  life’s not going to be a poster, there is an enemy out there, and you’re not supposed to hold his hand.  the existence of a fight shouldn’t worry you so much as the state of your heart.  is it full?  is it light?  and can i kick the stuffin’ out of it?  and if i did, are you going to cry?  or are you going to put on “your pointiest stilettos, biggest rings, and call your sister?”  cuz you know, that kinda sounds like fun.

the tablecloth

a friend was by the other day and when she sat down at my table she remarked, “i wish i would use my tablecloths more.”  which prompted me to confess that i was mostly in the same boat.  however, i have developed a plan.  (if you didn’t know that about me, i’m always hatching plans.)

personally, i could never find the right time to put on a tablecloth.  it always seemed a shame to throw one on before dinner, so people could defile it.  or, more pointedly, so i could wash it.  that and they always seemed like they needed ironed at the most inopportune moments.  and besides that, they were too pretty.  one thing led to another and i was quite certain my life would be over before i ever used them at all.  i would die and you would find piles of tablecloths at my posthumous estate sale.

well i won’t let it happen.  so here’s a simple trick: throw one on the table after lunch. genius, i know.  okay, for one thing, it makes me feel more excited about cleaning the kitchen after lunch (when i would rather be passed out dead).  second, i have all afternoon to enjoy it before it heads, with all due futility, to the laundry.  but lest that’s too easy, here is my second trick: put it on while the table is wet.  then you can smooth it down with your fingers.  it sucks down marvelously and dries nice and flat.  this tablecloth was line dried, crispy and wrinkled as all get-out, and you would never know.  anyways, the little things that keep me keeping on.  enjoy.  *m

eats

my boys are gone for a week.  sadness.  i guess we will have to eat without them.  more particularly, all the things they don’t like.

dinner:

m.  mushroom and herb polenta + kale chips + kiwis

t.  grilled quesidillas with black bean paste and salsa + tamarind jarritos + chocolate dipped strawberries

w.  socca with cherry tomatoes and creme fraiche  + grandma’s jello mold

t.  rolling sushi with friends + mud pie (jael’s bake day)

f.  fried potato masala + garlic naan + mango sticky rice+ bubble tea + company

s. – sun.  out of town

lunch:

m.  girls’ lunch out; beignets + bubble tea + spring rolls + baguette sandwich = $13

t.  w.w. pizza with white sauce, zucchini, mushrooms, and fresh basil + chubby sodas

w.  picnic at friend’s with grapes, cottage cheese, and wheat thins

thrs.  tacos!

fri.  soba teriyaki with broccoli and tofu

breakfast:

m.  yogurt parfaits

t.  strawberry frosted mini-wheats (jael’s pick = nasty) + egg cups

w.  mush + bananas

thrs.  oatmeal muffins + yogurt + tea

fri.  cereal + egg cups + yogurt

total = $126