love kills slowly

i recall promising wedding pictures.  well here you go.

and there she is.  my sister violet.  you know, the one with gold taps, sauna, and room for a pony?

it was a vintage pin-up/tattoo themed wedding.  exactly.  i remember violet came by and was telling me about not being able to decide on an arbor.  i said, “you don’t need no gay plastic arbor.  don’t you have friends who could airbrush a piece of artwork for you?”

“you know, one where you’re a flesh eating zombie sucking his face off?”  no, i didn’t actually suggest that last bit.  i don’t know where that came from.  but i can’t help but blame myself.

you gotta hand it to her though, the girl knew what she wanted.

she even had custom buttons made.  very cute.  for skeletons.

in the picture frame below you can see an original of her wedding invitation.  i do believe that’s more skeletons.

and look at that ornery kid.  okay, so he’s kinda cute.

my dad walking her down the aisle.

the three sisters.

signed, sealed, and delivered, no returns.

i just love young people in love.

the instant family of five.  they grow so fast.

the in-laws.

violet and her mother.

violet and her guardian.

violet and her other mother.  dude, how does she rate?

me telling her just as much.  god is indeed rich in his love towards us.

i do believe that’s rahab’s blue lace head-band jason’s getting at.

watch out boys.

actually, violet’s seminary student cousin creamed those punks for that garter.  boo-ya.  (please note that reuben did not even move for this exercise.)

jason’s family.  i think he has six siblings.

and violet with her relations.  only two are blood, the rest just love her.  and as you can see, all the empty spaces have been filled.

happy wedding day auntie piolet!  you done good. ♥m

me and my food baby

i’ve been thinking about food.

mmm…food.

our pastor mentioned once, that while he was in a third world country, a place full of ancestor worship and superstition, that a local came up to him and accused americans of being the ones who were idol worshipers.  when asked what he meant, the man referred to all the flashing restaurant signs and food billboards that litter our country.  i guess he thought we had an issue.  do we?

we already know you can pretty come up with any food gospel you want.  if you can think of it, it probably exists somewhere.  i recently saw a blog for a food counselor, whose whole purpose was to help you escape all the food lies so you could eat the stuff without a complex.  it’s food, you eat it.  you know, you pay her $100 an hour and she’ll set you straight.  so what is straight?  it should seem obvious that satan is having a hay day with the subject and that we should get our savvy on.  i think that calls for a few more food documentaries and a “commitment to a healthier lifestyle.”  oh wait, we tried that.

maybe we could just check what the bible says.  and then, you know, do what it says.  i think people are missing the boat because they are not fighting fire with fire.  they are granting food some kind of theological neutrality and then fighting it’s phobias and resultant bondage with their worldly squirt guns.  no, go for the big guns.  always go for the big guns.  and the biggest gun, when it comes to food, is gratitude.  rejoice.  and see where it takes you.  ”then he said unto them, go your way, eat the fat, and drink the sweet, and send portions unto them for whom nothing is prepared: for this day is holy unto our lord: neither be ye sorry; for the joy of the lord is your strength.”

but i’ll get back to that.  right now i just want to drop in on the second bad boy in the arsenal.  let’s apply some 1 corinthians 8:8.  ”food will not commend us to god. we are no worse off if we do not eat, and no better off if we do.”  read it and weep.  there is no morality in food, and if there is no morality, there is no guilt.  the bible practically bends over backwards trying to tell people not to mix food with the gospel.

“now the spirit expressly says that in later times some will depart from the faith by devoting themselves to deceitful spirits and teachings of demons, through the insincerity of liars whose consciences are seared, who forbid marriage and require abstinence from foods that god created to be received with thanksgiving by those who believe and know the truth. for everything created by god is good, and nothing is to be rejected if it is received with thanksgiving, for it is made holy by the word of god and prayer.”

it’s plain bad juju.  because what happens when you do try to eat your way to heaven?  well, for one thing, you start eating cookies with no sugar, no gluten, and no dairy.  and that’s just wrong.  the things people will or will not eat, and what they will pay for them, because of guilt are quite remarkable.  besides, when you get rid of all the “bad” foods, the only truly healthful options you have left are a handful of sprouted grains with your organic apple and raw carrot.  try saying thanks over that.  because it’s all bad for you.  refined flour, sugar, dairy, stimulants, mushrooms (a.k.a. vegetable parasites), yeast, alcohol, your pet dead animals, oil heated above room temperature, gluten, anything fermented or pickled, and, let’s face it, anything cooked.  i said you only got a sprouted lentil and i meant it.  and after that, guess what?  you’re still going to die.  oh…or did we forget the curse?  remember, it was god who shortened our years.  and he did that for our good.  he was even nice about it and did it through cheese and not random lightning storms that took out anyone above 75.  be glad.

i’m sure you’re still looking for an excuse to keep eating cardboard, but the point i really want to make is that god is for us, not against us.  we always make our stand, exactly where he makes his, and step out in faith.  we don’t sit there and make “what if’s” about whether it’s healthy enough.  does your god raise the dead or not?  then have some dignity and take your butter like a man.  besides, fear is not so near as effective of a weapon as exaltation.  because, really, what would happen if you did?  you know, if you waxed ecstatic over eating?  what would that look like?  and how would it look compared to everyone else and their incessant whining?  food is a glorious thing.  it’s a gift.  god made us like him, with an urge to create, and then placed us in the garden full of groceries.  do we sit there in the produce aisle, paralyzed by fear and nibbling on a turnip, or do we start frying mushrooms in butter?  pursue food.  go all out.  god has set before us a land flowing with milk and honey.  shout “hallelujah!” and jump in.  god wants to bless us.  he wants us to enjoy life and he wants us to enjoy it to the fullest.  and even if you think you can squeeze an extra five years out of your life by becoming vegan, drinking only alkalized water, and eating dry crusts of bread, i doubt it’s the quality of life he had in mind.

the table occupies a high place in scripture.  it’s the place where god meets with his people.  it’s where we share fellowship with others.  it’s where we sit down and enjoy the salvation that has already been accomplished on our behalf.  the world eats at wendy’s.  the world thinks a slimfast shake counts as a meal.  but only a christian can really enjoy food.  in god’s right hand are pleasures forevermore, but the wicked?

“i denied myself nothing my eyes desired;
i refused my heart no pleasure.
my heart took delight in all my labor,
and this was the reward for all my toil.
yet when i surveyed all that my hands had done
and what i had toiled to achieve,
everything was meaningless, a chasing after the wind;
nothing was gained under the sun.”

their food turns to ash.  but when we sit down at the table, when we enjoy the food god has given us, we are proclaiming to the world that we know from where our salvation comes.  so do a good job of it.  gourmet up.  set your table.  eat good food.  and by that, i mean food that tastes good.  and when you chill out a little, when you start enjoying and pursuing food, you will lose your taste for crack food.  also known as, “satan bait for idiots.”  the best antidote for which, is simply the goodwife.  the woman who is seeking to pour out on her family the goodness that god has for them, at her table.  because god is good.  that woman is like antiaircraft for high fructose corn syrup, untold numbers of diet ads, hungry man dinners, and eating disorders.  and do you know what’s even better?  the woman who does all of that with a smile.  someone once mentioned that the main reason we like to go to restaurants is because we sure don’t get that kind of service at home.  no one can make fry sauce like those nice girls at hooters.  and i can tell you now, there would be no divorce rate if you could make fry sauce like the girls at hooters.  you should go sometime.  we all could use a little refresh.

so whatever you do, don’t eat to live, live to eat.  don’t make an eleventh commandment called, “thou shalt be healthy” (because there isn’t one).  try doing what god said in the first place and find out that it’s even better.  love food.  love feeding people.  thank god for what you eat.  if you are pursuing the gift he gave us with thanks, not moralizing over it like he told us not to, we will be eating relatively more healthy food after all.   because it’s better food.  it’s still going to kill us, because frankly, it’s supposed to.  but our god is a god who brings life from death.  along the same lines, someone who is excited about food won’t be feeding kraft to their kids every day because, “hey, what difference does it make?”  no, we’re after glory.  they also won’t be slaves to every fear driven gimmick that comes along with the word “organic” written on it.  and i doubt they will be lining up to buy monsanto corn and hormone ready chicken either.  not because it’s “unhealthy” but because it’s not fitting.  it’s not suitable to our table.  we only go for the good stuff.

“so i commend the enjoyment of life, because nothing is better for a man under the sun than to eat and drink and be glad. then joy will accompany him in his work all the days of the life god has given him under the sun.”

p.s.  and for the record, when god made all foods clean, he meant all foods.  that even includes the healthy ones.  so by all means, be healthy.  i’m not telling you not to.  but like this article mentioned, if you feel like a “rabbi eating a b.l.t.” when you have a doughnut, know that satan has his claws in you like some pissed off kardashian.  cuz god loves doughnuts.  just not as much as he loves homemade lemon meringue pie.

bonny england

i’ve been up to something.  hot stuff and i are going to england for our ten year anniversary.  when it comes down it i am a die hard anglophile and i have no shame.  and he said yes.  first stop, eynsham hall hotel.

nothing like home away from home and the woman getting ideas and all that.  in the morning it’s off to see blenheim palace.  cuz i can.

my brother was asking me on the phone, “why do you want to go to england?  …oh wait, you want to look at houses, don’t you?”  it’s true.  big houses.

after that we will swing through the sickeningly cute village of bibury on our way to our next hotel.  i think it’s 60 miles.

we will spend two nights at marsh farm in wootton bassett.

which is right next door to lydiard house.  so i will have to see that too.  naturally.

day two we hit the town of tetbury and knock off with some bicycles and a well stocked hamper.

to go spend the day in some fat arboretum.  phat.

as it turns out, we are only going to england because my husband found out they had trees there.  at first he just thought the place was chock full of manor houses and sheep, but i was quick to lead him astray.  by the way, next to the arboretum is another manor house.  which i am also going to go see.  i am sure he will live to regret it.

and next to that manor house is, you got it,  another manor house.  suh-weet.

day three we might pop down to bath.  a 20 minute drive.

where you have such standard fare as the royal crescent, jane austen center, the assembly rooms, and roman baths.

then we have to bust our butts back to london.  where we might get to see westminster abbey and buckingham palace before we hop on the plane.  as if it were that easy.

i noticed it was easy to get distracted by all the things i “need” to see.  but really, my itinerary is quite simple.  i want to eat fish and chips.

okay, i also want to eat curry. and clotted cream and drink tea.  in fact, i want to fill up a suitcase with just tea and you can come to my house and drink it.  that and i’m pretty sure i want to buy a princess kate teacup for jael.  i want to ride bicycles through the countryside.  i want to go to a pipe shop.  i want to have a picnic in the woods with my true love.  and i want to buy a hat.

now if they would just stop putting freaking ginormous houses on every corner with “open house” signs on them.  she has no self-control.

jael spoiled on any given day

jael spoiled by aunt meggie

“do you want to be a hedonist when you grow up too?”

of course!

to each their own.

i was thinking about it, and i’m pretty sure not everyone would want their 4 year old practicing to be a painted lady.  which is why i decided to start now.  i’m way ahead of you.  by the time she’s old enough to wear make-up she will have learned what to do with eyeliner.  and it won’t be this.  i was listening to a talk the other day about how the exaltation of the unadulterated appearance is pagan in origin.  nature worship.  the same idea had a bit of a resurgence with the hippie movement.  let it all hang loose the way ol’ mother nature intended.  well, christians wear bras, make-up and shave their legs.  we are dominion oriented.  we take it, and we make it better.   i’m with clinique and jesus all the way.

that being said, we don’t want to efface god’s image in ourselves.  we don’t want to compete with it, we want to glorify it.  our goal with wearing make-up shouldn’t be to have everyone wondering how anyone could possibly spend that much time in front of the mirror, but for them to not notice it at all.  when someone comes away from you, their impressions shouldn’t have first been blitzkrieged by your flatulent fashion and obvious denial of your age.  they should just think, “my, that was a nice lady.”  we want to wear make-up, not because we’re hot after attracting attention to ourselves, but because we are considerate of others.  we want to look good for our husbands, friends, and children.  we want to smell nice, look nice, and be nice, because we love the people around us.

when we refuse to do anything with our appearance, it’s kind of like saying we don’t care what others think, because frankly, we don’t care about others.  to the other extreme, if we hit the spray tan booth, claire’s, and the feather extensions kiosk, we’re just advertising about how much we love ourselves.  in which case, we could have just saved ourselves the money and bought the t-shirt.  i want to raise my girls to be able to navigate this language and it’s extremes, to know exactly what they are saying, to say it well and to say it beautifully.  because, like everything else, make-up is not inherently evil and neither is it neutral.  it’s a force to be reckoned with.  and otto girls always play for keeps.

jael spoiled by grammy

new blogging station

which means i no longer have to use my husband’s computer.  which is in the laundry room, next to the furnace and paint cans.

and all because i took my little brother’s old nasty lap top.  it has it’s own evils, but at least piles of socks are not one of them.

pup cakes

idgi sent jael all the fixings for cupcakes, down to the little, pink silicon, baking hearts to cook them in.

and then we ate them.

anyways, i am now a fan of stabilized whipped cream frosting.  that butter sugar stuff?  yick.

spaceman spiff

i made gideon a “reading shawl.”  he makes me jealous.

i trimmed down my old down comforter to fit one of the twin beds.  in the end i had this little bit left over that i couldn’t throw away.

it is now gideon’s “nest.”

every time i look at him it just makes me sick.

post-birthday carnage