the aftermath

i had fourteen people stay at my house over christmas.  fun as it was, the aftermath is quite appalling.  i’ve been afraid to get out of bed all day, mostly on account of my kitchen floor.  but don’t worry, i will rally with time.

more about “untitled“, posted with vodpod

aunt natalie got the job of playing santa.  that is gideon in the background unfurling the new british flag for his tree fort.

and here are the boys waxing ecstatic over their new pirate ship.  which will, no doubt, soon suffer hostile takeover by the navy.

here we have natalie sporting her new housecoat, rezon making off with jehu’s bow and arrow and gideon and jehu admiring yet another killing of playmobil.

jael in her peru sweater and mommy wearing her big beautiful ring, as it has been dubbed by the boys.

it’s from daddy.  it was the last package under the tree, duct taped in a cardboard box, marked with a sharpie and cushioned with random bits of recycling.  oh, how he loves me.

reuben, on the other hand, had to buy himself his own christmas present.  a mark III.  he is rather impressed with himself and we had to drive miles up in the hills to shoot it.

my toes froze off.

here we are trying to take the obligatory group photo before we ran out of light.  this is pretty much how it went.

i did successfully corner my three.  i love jael’s new dress from auntie piolet.

and gideon is faring much better after his yuletide tonsillectomy.  other than sounding like a five inch tall girl on helium.  we find it hard to take him seriously.

and the day after christmas my mother rented a motel downtown.  we went swimming, watched dirty jobs and saw how cows get fed down a chipper, visited anthropology and palmer cash, went out for sushi, caught the new sherlock holmes and had a jammy run to the lobby with all the babies for goodnight cocoa.  it was fun.  but i still have to go scrub the floor.  it is disgusting.  *m

happy christmas from the ottos

and we mean it.

a christmas apron

in the event of needing a quick christmas present, aprons do whip up nice.  you don’t need a pattern and you can use whatever you have around.

plus, sewing aprons does cheer a body up.  …then again, so does shopping.  and bubble tea.  and glitter confetti nail polish, to name a few.

still, if you want to give it a try, this is a good tutorial here.  enjoy.  *m

a little kitty birthday

birthdays are sneaky.  we were still crashed at my in-laws when i remembered jehu was going to have his in a week.  so i started thinking (that’s what always happens).  my father-in-law had just offered me some steel head that morning and it occurred to me, “hey, don’t little kitties eat fish?”  that’s how i ended up having 42 people over for dinner when i was originally thinking cake.

more about “untitled“, posted with vodpod

but it was grand.  and the little kitty loved it.

we made lemon glazed carrots, grilled steel-head, caesar salad, rosemary roasted potatoes, french bread, trifle and cranberry punch.  and with 23 little demons running around – no china was broken and there is no chocolate to be seen on my white couch.  i consider myself empowered.  except now all my friends are wise to my ways and probably know better than to come over.

more about “untitled“, posted with vodpod

at the end of the party we had a mouse hunt in the basement.  when my mother-in-law had showed up that day, she naively asked what she could do to help.  “oh,” i said, “…you could sew 70 mice for me out of felt and stuff them with candy.”  grandpa even glued all the eyes on.  talk about fortuitous.

they even stayed and helped muck out the toy room the next day.  what brave good souls.  i’m just not sure they are coming next year…

a deluge of random photos taken in bad light to make up for lost time (photoshop can’t save me now)

we’ve been gone.  if you haven’t noticed.  this is mostly where.  (also known as, “who knows where.” )  i barely made it back alive.

but i think the children enjoyed themselves in heathendom.  all the not bathing, fried eggs on demand, swords, guns, youtube jujitsu,  early morning potato canon firing, driving without seat belts, and reuben lighting his hand on fire with lighter fluid for evening amusement.  for the under 5 bracket, this is as good as it gets.

and they feed you cheeeese.

here is my sister natalie – the dawn of civilization in a tin cup of primordial ooze.   (ooze mostly comprised of reuben.  she can kick his butt, when she unsheathes her nails from the muff.  just think of what happened to the poor muskrat.)

and this is my sister sarah, who just moved back from north carolina.  hooray, hooray.

the highlight of our trip was when gideon and jehu found natalie’s bb guns.  gideon informed me, “mother, today is the best day of all the days i have been in the world.  …because i have found a gun.”

i’m cruel indeed.  my policy is that they can have a gun when they are old enough to have a .22.  they don’t even get toy guns.  they have to make do with whatever they can concoct out of tinker toys and their pointy finger.  suffice to say, otto’s don’t come any happier than this:

here is jael and her arch nemesis, misterchievous.  the dynamic duo of trouble.

yes, you might just think they are cute.  ask the kitty what he thinks and he will tell you different.  but i’m sure he’s still hiding in a snowbank somewhere, after lestat tried to saw him in half.

this is mia.  we made a cake and were impressed with ourselves.

and here we are going on a walk.  (“we’re all going to die!”)

(yes, you want to watch out for her.)

and especially her.

it even snowed during our trip.

the kids made a fort and then blew holes in it with the potato canon.

and i made pies.  the first two i didn’t get to try on account of the locusts.  but i wised up for rounds two and three.  with 14 people you could cook and wash dishes (by hand) all day and never actually get anything else done.  in fact, if you try to clean then you can’t cook.  fortunately the locusts have been conditioned to subsist on raisin bran and dry toast.

and this is clive and jael.  an eyeball extravaganza.

anyways, now i’m home.  i mucked out the car, cleaned house, threw together jehu’s birthday and now it is time for christmas.  oh goody.

honey, i’m home!

that was a four week vacation.  and no, i didn’t miss you.

***and now i realize i left the umbilical cord for my camera in jerome.  sad but true.  i will try and blog sunday.  don’t wait up for me.  *m